How To Relax: 7 Techniques To Try

Life can be stressful, and there’s a good chance that “relaxation” isn’t blocked off on your calendar — even if it should be.

“We need to think of relaxing not as a stopping point, but as a necessary pause,” says psychologist Susan Albers, PsyD.

But most of us were never taught how to relax. And too much time running endlessly on life’s hamster wheel may have you wondering where to start and what relaxation techniques to try.

Dr. Albers is here to help.

Relaxation techniques to calm anxiety

Relaxation can look different depending on your needs and what works best for you. These seven techniques can help you lower stress, ease anxiety and care for your mental health.

1. Breathing exercises

When you’re wound up, it messes with your breathing. You might breathe too quickly or breathe shallowly. Either way, it can keep your body and mind revved up and on edge.

Focusing on your breath is a sure way to relax and release tension quickly.

Dr. Albers suggests a technique called squeegee breath:

1. Close your eyes.
2. Imagine a window squeegee at the top of your head.
3. As you breathe out, imagine the squeegee pushing toxic thoughts and energy down to your toes and out of your body, like dirty water at the bottom of a window.
4. Then, breathe in deeply and imagine positive thoughts coming in like fresh, clean water.
5. Continue to breathe in and out.

Other breathwork exercises to try include five-finger breathing, box breathing and holotropic breathing.

2. Physical activity

To relax, you should get moving. Yes, that sounds counterintuitive — but here’s why it works.

Exercise encourages your body to produce endorphins, feel-good chemicals that help you mellow out (not to mention all the other benefits of exercise).

If you’re up for a sweat session, going for a run or doing high-intensity interval training (HIIT) can do the job. But your workout doesn’t have to be grueling to get the endorphins pumping. Try swimming, walking and simple calisthenics, like squats, lunges or burpees.

Finding it tough to get the motivation to exercise? Take a cue from “joyful movement” and seek out active fun, like dancing, roller skating or joining a sports team.

3. Mindfulness

When life is hectic, it can be easy to switch to autopilot and try to just grind through your day. But that can mean missing out on the beauty of the present.

“Mindfulness is like engaged relaxation,” Dr. Albers explains. “When you can be fully immersed in the present — rather than worried about the future or stuck in the past — you can better come to peace with what’s happening around you and inside of you.”

The result? Big-time relaxation.

Meditation is one way to do mindfulness. Sitting still with your thoughts (without judging them!) can help you stay present and grounded.

And no, meditating doesn’t have to mean sitting crossed-legged and alone for hours. There are lots of ways to meditate, and you can practice for as long or as short a time as you need. Try progressive muscle relaxation or guided imagery.

4. Fresh air

Getting out in nature and touching grass (literally or figuratively) can be a game-changer for your well-being. Feel the sun on your face. Enjoy the wind in your hair. Breathe in that sweet, sweet outside air.

“Just walking away from your computer, your phone and your to-do list can be relaxing,” Dr. Albers says. “A change of scenery can help to take you out of those stressful moments and gain some perspective.”

Sure, a trip to the beach can do the trick, but so can simply spending some time on your patio or taking a walk down the street. Looking for a more immersive experience in the great outdoors? Forest bathing might be for you.

5. Purposeful downtime

If bed-rotting, binge-watching and doomscrolling are your go-to relaxation techniques, it’s time to question whether they’re really doing you any favors.

Too much mindless time watching other people live their lives isn’t as relaxing as it might seem. You can start comparing your life to theirs, and convince yourself that yours doesn’t stack up.

Instead, put down the remote, step away from your phone and spend some quality time doing something you enjoy. For some people, that might mean:

• Reading
• Arts and crafts
• Dancing
• Journaling
• Playing board games
• Cooking and baking
• Gardening

“It’s not about what you do with your time. It’s how it makes you feel and whether it allows you to put down your worries and let the stress go,” Dr. Albers notes.

Your hobbies are all about doing what you want to do.

6. Self-care

Truly caring for yourself isn’t just about pampering. It’s about meeting your most basic needs, like:

• Going to medical appointments you’ve been putting off
• Meal prepping so your evenings aren’t so rushed
• Committing to a regular group activity, like an exercise class or a book club
• Showering regularly
• Sticking to your skin care routine
• Practicing effective sleep hygiene to get the rest you need

“Real self-care isn’t just this grand thing you do every so often when you desperately need some me-time,” Dr. Albers reminds us. “It’s about keeping yourself a priority, which can lower your stress and help you to relax.”

7. Integrative medicine

Integrative medicine therapies can help you relax, while improving your health and wellness. That includes practices like:

• Acupuncture
• Massage
• Reiki
• Tai chi
• Yoga

Relaxation benefits

Relaxing has enormous benefits that span both your physical and mental health. Specifically, practicing relaxation techniques regularly may lead to:

• Fewer physical effects of stress, like headaches, stomachaches and muscle tension
• Better sleep
• Improved mood
• A stronger immune system to fight off illness
• Fewer racing thoughts
• Enhanced focus, concentration and mental clarity
• Lowered risk for mental health conditions, like anxiety disorders and depression

“Relaxation is like shifting into a lower gear and cruising for a while, letting your body regenerate and recover,” Dr. Albers illustrates.

Putting relaxation into practice

Getting more relaxation sounds blissful. But in reality, it can be a tough transition.

“Our culture focuses on go-go-go. The world around us tells us we should constantly be doing something,” says Dr. Albers. “As a result, downtime can feel foreign or uncomfortable.”

Here are some things to remember when working relaxation into your life:

• Get rid of the guilt. Give yourself permission to relax. “It’s necessary to recharge our batteries, and we need to accept and allow for that,” Dr. Albers emphasizes. “Remind yourself that relaxation is essential — not a guilty pleasure.”
• Practice. Just like any skill, relaxation takes practice. “We often attempt to learn to relax when we’re in crisis. That’s like trying to learn to swim in the middle of a wave,” Dr. Albers points out. “If we practice relaxing when we’re calm, we’ll get better at it.”
• Discover what works best for you. “Take note of when you feel the most relaxed,” she recommends. “Relaxing is so individual. It can take some time to find what works best for you.”
• Use technology thoughtfully. Being constantly plugged in can make it hard to relax. Try putting your phone away and see how that feels. Or test out using your devices to support your relaxation, like playing soothing music or using an app that walks you through relaxation exercises.
• Ask for help. If you’re having a hard time finding the relaxation you need, professional mental health support can help. Therapy can help you understand your triggers and develop healthy coping strategies.

And above all, remember that relaxing is important and well worth your effort.

“You can often tell when somebody has been stressed over a long period of time. They look worn down. They can have more illnesses or colds,” Dr. Albers says. “Relaxation leads to more strength and resilience.” And we could all use more of that.