Impostor Syndrome May Be Holding You Back

No matter how much evidence there is that we’re successfully navigating our lives, jobs and relationships, many of us hold onto false beliefs that we aren’t actually as capable or smart as others think we are.

When we get a promotion, reach a milestone or complete a project, we downplay the achievement: We’re just hard workers! We didn’t really do anything special to earn our successes.

Others might have a different perspective: We were lucky this time, but there’s no way we’re going to pull that off again. Anyone could have pulled off this achievement.

But by doubting yourself, especially in areas where you excel, you can end up dealing with persistent patterns of self-doubt, negative self-talk and missed opportunities. Or you may end up trying to over-compensate for your extreme fear of failure, burning yourself out unnecessarily and causing yourself a great deal of anxiety in the process.

These cases of imposter syndrome, or imposter phenomenon, turn us into our own worst enemies by reinforcing our negative self-perception through unhealthy thought patterns and behaviors. Over time, according to psychologist Susan Albers, PsyD, imposter syndrome can have a very real, long-lasting impact on our mental, emotional and physical health. But there are ways you can stop it before it spins out of control.

What is impostor syndrome?

Imposter syndrome is a psychological phenomenon where someone persistently feels like a fraud, disbelieves in the legitimacy of their own success and has a fear of being exposed. Although imposter syndrome is not a true medical diagnosis, it’s characterized by increasing levels of self-doubt and negative self-perception. Rather than believing in or appreciating their own achievements, someone with imposter syndrome tends to attribute their successes and self-worth to external factors like luck, random chance or good will.

“It’s the feeling that everyone else knows exactly what they’re doing, but you feel lost because you don’t believe you deserve your achievements,” explains Dr. Albers. “You also have this fear that the people around you are going to figure out that you don’t know what you’re talking about and expose you as a fraud.”

In exchange, someone with imposter syndrome tends to either pull back from reaching their true potential or throw themselves into the deep-end in order to make up for their perceived inevitable failure.

Symptoms of impostor syndrome

Imposter syndrome shows up in different ways, but most often it involves low self-esteem and disparaging thoughts about where you stand with other people and how you view yourself. Some signs of imposter syndrome include:

• Feeling unworthy of affection or attention
• Having an irrational fear of failure or the future
• Having increased anxiety related to performance or task management
• Downplaying your accomplishments
• Holding back from reaching attainable goals
• Crediting your successes to luck or other reasons outside of your control
• Having difficulties processing or accepting praise, compliments or award recognition
• Overworking or people-pleasing to meet the expectations of others
• Comparing yourself and your achievements against other people

According to author and imposter syndrome expert Valerie Young, PhD, there are five types of imposter syndrome:

1. Perfectionist: A perfectionist will constantly undermine their own authority unless they feel they’ve done everything perfectly. They often feel like an imposter if there’s the slightest hint of error.
2. Expert: This type of imposter syndrome revolves around the idea that there’s always something else you could learn from a specific subject or experience. This person tends to doubt themselves or feel intense shame when there’s even a minor lack of knowledge or understanding.
3. Natural genius: If something doesn’t come easily to you or if you find a particular project challenging, you might have imposter syndrome around your natural abilities. If, for example, you’re a creative writer and it takes you five hours to bang out a paper, you might beat yourself up for taking so long on something that usually takes you less time to complete.
4. Soloist: The soloist thinks they can do everything on their own, largely because they value their independence. They feel like an imposter when they have to ask for help or advice because it goes against their natural inclinations and comes with a great deal of shame or resentment.
5. Superhuman: This person measures their success based on how much they can accomplish and how far they’re willing to go to succeed. Someone with a savior complex might feel like an imposter if they always think they can or should be doing more because they can never do enough.

What causes imposter syndrome?

A 2020 systematic review of 62 studies with over 14,000 participants found that imposter syndrome is a common phenomenon that can occur in up to 82% of people.

“The original imposter syndrome study in the 1970s revolved around high-achieving women who had trouble attributing their own success to themselves. But when you fast forward to today, men, women and everybody experiences this phenomenon,” Dr. Albers says.

You may develop imposter syndrome, in part, as a result of specific parenting styles. If you come from a home where you were under extreme pressure to perform well at school or with sports, for example, you could spend years in a cycle of self-doubt, eventually carrying imposter syndrome into your adulthood.

In the same way, your attachment styles can also increase your likelihood for developing imposter syndrome. If you have an anxious attachment style [JB1] and need constant reassurance, you may also develop the fear of failure or the feeling that you’re not “good enough.”

Other factors like cultural, religious and cognitive biases can also impact the development of imposter syndrome. But it’s important to remember that imposter syndrome is dependent on your own internal beliefs regarding your self-worth. If other people (or society at large) does something to make you feel like you don’t belong, that’s discrimination.

"Imposter syndrome is the voice inside your head telling you that you don't belong, while discrimination is the voice of others telling you the same thing," explains Dr. Albers. “This distinction is crucial because it highlights that imposter syndrome is a personal struggle that can be addressed through self-reflection and cognitive reframing, whereas discrimination requires societal change and advocacy.”

Examples of imposter syndrome

Imposter syndrome and its symptoms can manifest in many ways, including:

• At work: People with an imposter mindset often attribute their success to luck rather than their own abilities and work ethic, which could hold them back from asking for a raise or applying for a promotion. They might also feel like they have to overwork themselves to achieve the impossibly high standards they’ve set.
• At home: Any parent can probably remember a point in time when they felt clueless, incapable and totally unprepared for the responsibility of raising a child. If these feelings go unchecked, parents could struggle to make decisions for their child out of fear they’re going to mess up their life.
• At school: Students might avoid speaking up in class or asking questions for fear that teachers or classmates might think they’re clueless. Or they could put intense pressure on themselves to over-achieve, resulting in burnout.
• In relationships: Some people feel unworthy of the affection they get from a significant other and fear their partner will discover they’re not actually that great. “Sometimes, people self-sabotage that relationship and end it before the other person can,” Dr. Albers says.

How to overcome impostor syndrome

Overcoming imposter syndrome starts with recognizing your own potential and taking ownership of your achievement. Dr. Albers offers these suggestions:

• Separate feelings from facts: Recognize that just because you think these things, doesn’t mean they’re true. Question your thoughts and look for the physical evidence that you are an imposter. Chances are, you might not find any.
• Take note of your accomplishments: It can be helpful to have a tangible reminder of your successes. Display your awards, keep affectionate mementos and review text messages or emails that praise your success. That evidence can help ground you in times of doubt.
• Stop comparing yourself to others: Comparing your own life to a carefully curated influencer’s social media feed, for example, is a trap for feeling like you don’t measure up. “True imposters don’t have this feeling,” says Dr. Albers. Let that be motivation to continue pushing forward.
• Talk to someone: Sometimes, a good chat with someone who knows you and supports you can help you realize that your imposter feelings are normal, but also irrational. That includes making time to find a therapist.

“Action really helps overcome this,” Dr. Albers says. “It’s about not getting stuck in the thought of ‘I can’t do this,’ but making sure that you take action and move forward.”

Self-doubt can be paralyzing. But now that you know how to recognize and deal with these feelings, you can make efforts to move forward instead of getting stuck in the imposter cycle.